Friday, July 22, 2011

Next time, a nom de plume

Do you ever have one of those moments when you're finally about to carry out a large decision, and you come face to face with the realization that... it's not nearly as climactic as you anticipated?

I did. ALL WEEK. Sigh. Let me explain.

A few months ago: I received an e-mail from the records office, asking what name I wanted printed on my degree. So Joey and I discussed this over a week or so and finally concluded that I would add 'Foutz' to my middle name. (because it's far too perfect to give up completely.) So my degree will read "Katherine Megan Foutz Voss."

A few weeks ago: I got married. I did not change my name immediately.

Last week: I wanted to know if it was better to change the Social Security card or the license first. I had a "renew your license!" notice in the mail and thus made a whole bunch of phone calls...at night... which resulted in NO information whatsoever. I spent a lot of time listening to a computer tell me things I didn't need to know. I scoured the websites for direction but found none. Lost, confused, and ultimately very frustrated, I gave up and went to bed.

Also last week: I called the computer back and told it I wanted to talk to a person. I asked me several times if I was sure. Then, while being on hold, the computer reminded me every thirty seconds that "Talking to the computer is so much better" blah blah blah. And THEN when I called the DOL, I actually got message saying, "We're so busy, we can't even put you on hold."

Monday: Joey and I drove down to the Social Security Administration in Puyallup, had an awkward conversation with a security officer, had to wipe up drool on a counter from the previous client, and ended up not being able to do anything. We drove home. And instead of going to Seattle for the required certified copies of our marriage license, we bought groceries for the move to IL.

Tuesday: We drove all the way to Seattle, and bought two copies of the license for $6 total. After deciding we had time for nothing else (because government offices close at 4:30) we visited my brother and went home.

Wednesday: We drove back to Puyallup, to the original SSA office, and had an even longer and more awkward conversation with the security officer who apparently is a recovering alcoholic and used to collect bottle caps. We gave the nice man behind the plastic window the certified copy.... and he gave it back to us. He didn't ask for my I.D. So we still had two copies. And he gave me a receipt, showing I had changed my name, so I could prove it at the DOL.

So we went to the DOL where I originally got my license, and I was greeted by the nicest DOL associate I've ever encountered. She gave me a number. We sat in some strange chairs which Joey proceeded to break. (just kidding. they were just really noisy chairs.) And when they called me up, the woman behind the counter didn't ask for my social security card, or the receipt. She took the certificate, and gave it back. We still had two copies.

It took a long time to explain to her my intentions with my name--yes, I'm adding that to my middle name. No, don't hyphenate it. Yes, I know that will be part of my middle name. Yes, that's what I meant.

Long story short... I could have saved $3 and several conversations and a lot of gas. The important thing is that I'm now officially a Voss. (but forever and always a Foutz.)

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